What We Are
by shulesaddict77
Summary: Maybe they didn't know what they were to each other or maybe they knew exactly what they were. Spoilers for 2x21. COMPLETE


**Okay, let me just say … I'm well aware that some of you (or a lot of you) will be like … **_"No way, that's not what they did write on the cards"_** … at the end of this one-shot. But I actually think they could really have written it (or maybe I'm just a hopeless romantic) because we all know that both 'overreact' when they are put under pressure and Russell was pressuring them. Let's face it, Russell was kind of a jerk in this episode and I have only one explanation for his shocked expression when he read the cards. But I'm not saying that they are ready to say it out loud, especially not to each other. That will take some time.**

**Oh, and I actually watched the card scene over and over again to make out what Jake is writing down and I think he could have written the word I wish both did write on their cards. LOL. I know I'm insane.**

**I hope you enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: As always, not mine! :-(**

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This wasn't working.

How was he supposed to deal with _this_? He'd told her it was ridiculously hot. It didn't matter that she said they would keep their distance because it was still hot. Knowing that he couldn't touch her made the whole situation just worse.

Suddenly Jess stopped the effort to get the jar open as she realized what she was doing. Her eyes met his gaze for a few seconds before she turned away. She'd told him there would be no funny business anymore. She could hardly rub it in his face now. That would be like waving a red cloth in front of a bull.

"Jess, I can help you." Nick said quietly. This was ridiculous. She shouldn't feel the need to turn away from him, she should still be able to ask him for help.

"I got it." Jess said, slight exasperation tinging her voice. It couldn't be that hard, could it? It was just a damn jar. Grabbing the jar, she smashed it against the table, hoping for the lid to just miraculously pop open. But of course it didn't.

"Oh God. I don't even … I don't even … I don't even want ..." The rest of the sentence died on her lips as she turned around, realizing that he was standing directly in front of her and she suddenly didn't know anymore if she was talking about the jar or him. Strange feelings were rushing through her body as he took the jar out of her hands and opened it for her.

"Thank you." Jess breathed.

"You're welcome." His deep voice sent a chill down her spine and she knew that she needed to get the hell out of the kitchen. Immediately. "I'm gonna go to bed now."

"Okay." Nick answered softly and raised the beer bottle to his mouth. He knew exactly what he was doing. After all the beer was right there. He wasn't strong enough to pass up such an opportunity, especially since her words from earlier had stung. He needed to see if it would still affect her.

Jess stared at him wide-eyed and her mouth fell open. He wouldn't dare, would he?

"Don't!" She whispered, exhaling a shuddering breath as she took a step back.

It looked as if he was thinking about it for a second and Jess hoped that he would just gulp it down. But of course he didn't. Tilting his head back, he opened his mouth and gurgled, throwing her a challenging look and she almost gasped out loud as his action made her stomach clench almost painfully and in an act of self-preservation she averted her gaze. "I have to go to sleep now."

"I'll walk with you." His answer made her want to slap him. He was doing it on purpose. Trying to drive her to her breaking point. But she would not give in.

He wanted her to feel it. He wanted her to want him. But as they walked slowly towards their rooms he realized that he was as affected as she apparently was. As he turned towards her to face her, he was barely able to breathe normally. God, he wanted her so much. And then her eyes flickered to his mouth and he almost lost control. Right then and there. He wanted to grab the bowl and jar out of her hands and throw them to the ground. He wanted to pull her into his body and kiss her senseless, wanted to show her that calling what was between them funny business was probably the most inaccurate description ever. But he didn't do it. She'd told him they needed to stop. He wouldn't be the one to make the first move.

Her eyes settled on his loosened tie for a second, the urge to grab it and yank him towards her was almost unbearable. Tearing her eyes away from the open V of his shirt, she met his gaze, his burning stare almost knocking the breath out of her. No, she would not kiss him. She would not kiss him. No funny business. Middle school dance rules. Three feet on the floor. No body hugs.

"Good night, Miller." She said, barely above a whisper.

"Good night, Day." As his eyes flickered to her mouth for a second she almost lost it. Her fingers tightened around the jar and she hugged the bowl closer to her body, repeating the same mantra in her head over and over again.

_Don't kiss him. Don't kiss him. Don't kiss him. Just turn around, go to your room and close your door. Now._

Nick stared after her, barely able to stay where he was. He wanted to follow her. So badly. But he wouldn't do it. It was probably one of the hardest things he'd ever done in his life to turn around and walk away from her.

~N&J~

"What am I doing?" Nick said, shaking his head. She would probably be asleep by now. His hand dropped down beside his body but his eyes stayed glued to her door. He had almost knocked. He didn't even know what he should say to her.

Turning around, he walked slowly back to his room, rubbing his hand over his face. He almost missed the light sound of her door opening behind him and he froze in the door frame of his room, waiting for her to say something. Anything.

"Nick? What are you doing?" Jess said quietly.

Nick took in a deep breath, bracing himself to face her, taking a few seconds to prepare himself for the sight that would await him when he turned around. She would wear one of her flannel pajamas, her hair would be tousled from sleep, her eyes clouded. He wasn't sure if he could deal with her looking like this right now. His body had been in constant arousal since the moment she grabbed that damn jar in the kitchen. There was only so much a man could endure.

"Nick?" Her soft voice reached his ear and he finally turned around to her, his eyes meeting hers hesitantly. "I don't know, Jess."

Neither of them moved, both just standing there, staring at each other. He still didn't know what he could say to her, what he should say to her. The longing was tearing at his heart and he pressed his hand hard into the wood of the door frame, trying to stay strong, to not run over to her.

Jess looked at him expectantly but this freaking idiot still didn't make a move. God, you had to admire his strength. But she wasn't that strong. Pushing away from the door frame, she walked towards him, her eyes never leaving his until she stood directly before him, their bodies almost touching.

"What are you doing?" Nick said hoarsely and Jess lifted her hand, putting it softly against his chest. He was wearing the same green shirt he had been wearing when he'd first kissed her and a wave of emotions swept over her, the memories of their kisses assaulting her brain.

"I don't know, Nick." Her fingers flexed against his chest and he inhaled sharply. He stared down at her, her face so close to his that he could feel her breath brushing over his lips.

"This is not three feet." Nick whispered.

"I know." Jess replied, her hand trailed along his chest up to his neck, pulling him down to her slowly until their lips were almost touching. "Screw the dance rules."

His hands slipped around her waist as his lips opened up for her and she slipped her tongue into his mouth, expecting the kiss to turn passionate any second. Like the last two times. But this time it stayed soft and sensual, making her toes curl. This was no assault, this was a caress. A kiss that melted her bones and she pressed her body against his, sighing into his mouth as his hand found its way to her face, his fingers brushing over her cheek as he deepened the kiss.

The kiss seemed to last forever before he stepped back, taking her with him, shutting the door with his foot without releasing her out of his arms. His hands were back on her waist, his thumbs skimming tentatively over the naked skin of her stomach and Jess shuddered, a sudden lump closing up her throat as the emotions he elicited in her threatened to consume her.

Pressing her hands against his chest, she leaned back. She needed to see his face, needed to see his eyes. She was losing all sense of reality, everything felt like she was only dreaming. But then she met his gaze, his dark eyes gleaming softly with restrained passion and a sudden warmth spread out in her body.

"Take off your clothes." It wasn't voiced like a command, not like the last time where he had shouted it at her. This time it was more like a plea, his eyes burning hot and steady. "I want to see you."

Jess stepped out of his embrace, her fingers reaching for the buttons of her pajama top, slowly slipping the buttons through the holes.

There was no turning back now. They would cross that last line. There would be no more interruptions. No more backing away. They were really doing it.

Nick walked slowly over to her, his hands brushing against the open lapels of her pajama as he leaned down and said into her ear, his voice hoarse with desire. "Do you wanna have sex with me, yes or no?"

His hands slipped under the top, his fingers brushing over her stomach, his thumbs coming dangerously close to her breasts. Her breath caught in her throat and she pulled his head down to her, her lips pressing against his, her tongue searching his for one hot and passionate kiss before she whispered against his lips. "Yes."

~N&J~

She was lying in his arms, wearing one of his flannel shirts, her body still humming with the afterglow. It had been as amazing as his kisses had promised. But there was still something nagging in the dark corners of her brain. She just needed to know.

"Nick, what did you write on your card?" Jess asked softly and he immediately stiffened in her arms.

"It was silly actually." Nick said, slipping out of her embrace and throwing the covers away to stand up. "I just wrote something to prove Russell wrong."

"If it's so silly why can't you tell me then?"

"I ..." Nick paused, stepping away from the bed until he reached the middle of the room before he turned around to face her. "What did you write on _your _card?"

"I think … it might be …" Jess trailed off, licking her lips nervously before she took in a deep breath and continued. "I think we wrote down the same."

"You think?"

"Yeah."

"One word?"

"Yes, one word." Her breath hitched in her throat and she pressed the words past the lump that suddenly had appeared in her throat. "Four letters."

Nick stared at her, a whirlwind of emotions flickering over his face and he clenched his hand into a fist. She could see him struggle with what he wanted to say next but at least a determined look crossed his face and he asked softly. "Beginning with an L and ending on an E?"

"Yes." Jess breathed, letting out a soft sigh. "That's what I wrote on my card."

"I wrote the same." Nick said, his voice barely above a whisper.

They were staring at each other, the seriousness of the situation filling the air between them. They actually didn't say the words. But they didn't have to. Not now. He didn't think he was able to say those three words out loud yet. And somehow she understood. Of course she did. She was Jess. She was one of his best friends. She knew she couldn't push him, she knew that him telling her what he wrote on the card, even if he didn't actually say it, was already a huge step for him.

Jess gulped hard, tears threatening to rise up in her eyes. Of course he didn't say the words. But he was Nick Miller after all. She couldn't expect him to just blurt out his feelings. But he did tell her that he wrote the same word on his card as she did write on hers. One word. Four letters.

_Love_

Because that was what they were. They were in love with each other and they knew it. The words would come later. There was no need for him to say them now. She didn't need to hear them to know how he felt about her. She could see it. She had felt it. She had felt his love as she was lying underneath him, as he was showing her his love with every move of his body, with every brush of his hands and lips. No, she didn't need to hear the words. He had told her everything she needed to know with his body. The words would come eventually. She could wait.

Nick was watching her warily and she shot him a soft smile before she slipped out of the bed and stepped closer, wrapping her arms around his waist, leaning her head against his shoulder.

"Another time?" Jess whispered against his chest and Nick relaxed, pressing his face in her hair, a smile tugging up the corner of his mouth. He knew exactly what she was referring to. She would give him the time he needed. Because he would say the words. Eventually. When he was ready.

"Another time." Nick replied quietly.

"Let's get back into bed."

"Together?"

"What?" Jess said, leaning back. "Do you wanna throw me out of your room, Nicholas? Maybe I should have written 'one-night stand' on this card instead."

"As if this ever could have been a 'one time only thing'." Nick said, chuckling slightly as his arms tightened around her.

Leaning down, he scooped her up in his arms and Jess wrapped her hands around his neck, a silly grin spreading out on her face as he was carrying her towards the bed, laying her down gently before he slipped under the covers with her. Wrapping an arm around her, Nick pulled her into his body, his fingers intertwining with hers as he whispered into her hair.

"Good night, Day."

"Good night, Miller." Jess replied, snuggling deeper into his embrace.

Russell was wrong. They knew exactly what they were to each other. Their lives had changed the moment they met. They would be fine. Because no matter what, they would always have each other's back.

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**I'm actually surprised myself that I kept it T-rated. Maybe my dirty mind is exhausted after being so occupied with Killian and Emma lately. :-)**

**Oh, and I'm on Tumblr now under the same penname. Just wanted to let you know. :-)**

**So, tell me your thoughts and please review! I love hearing from my readers. Enjoy your weekend! **


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